How To Make Rejection In Your Dating Life The Best Thing Ever
The very first time I was rejected, I had at least 20 cardboard boxes surrounding me.
I was breaking down boxes at my retail job in high school when my co-worker (who I thought was super hot) came in to ask me something.
In a moment of courage I blurted out:
“Hey, want to go make out in the corner?”
(Clearly, 17 year old me was not very smooth )
He looked at me with the weirdest face and quickly rejected me by mumbling something quietly and walking away.
YIKES
I was SO scared to get rejected again that…
I spent years rejecting people before they could reject me, and I never truly opened myself up vulnerably enough to have the the deep connection in dating or my relationships where I felt truly seen and fulfilled.
This showed up as:
-Judging people I hardly knew on stuff I wouldn’t want to be judged for
-Assuming the worst in the dates I was going out on
-Not focusing on the things that truly matter in building a great relationship
-Walking away at the slightest sign of discomfort or disagreement
…do any of these sound familiar?
It got to a point where I kept repeating the same patterns over and over again, and I clearly wasn’t getting a different result.
If I wanted something different, I had to do something differently.
And so I began the VERYYYY nerve wracking journey to become comfortable with rejection.
I learned that fear of rejection is wired into us from birth and is natural to feel, but we also have the ability to rewire this default setting.
Fast forward to two years ago, when I could have easily been “rejected” by the guy I gave my number to…
But instead turned into the best relationship I’ve ever been (shoutout to my boyfriend Tom in the pic above).
On the other side of the possibility of rejection…
Could be a funny story.
Could be a lesson to learn.
Could be more confidence.
And could even be the best relationship you’ve ever had.
Rejection is a very real possibility, in anything we do in life.
Anytime you want to go after something new, or make a change, or get a new job, or start a business, or take it to the next level in dating.
When you heal your fear of rejection in your dating life…
It will have a beautiful ripple effect out to ALL areas of your life. Guaranteed.
Everything is connected.
When you shift your fear of rejection, your world opens up.
Without shifting it, your world stays the same.
This is why when I work with my high caliber clients we DON’T just focus on the practical aspects of dating — but make sure we address our internal beliefs and fears surrounding rejection (along with elevating our mindset, confidence, and strategy).
(If you’d like support on this and are ready to prioritize your relationship goals for the year, click here to explore private coaching).
We do not attract simply what we want, we attract who we are BEING.
This week on the podcast, I get into how to start healing your fear of rejection.
You’ll discover:
-Why healing your fear of rejection will allow you to stand out in a crowded dating world
-The top mistakes I see people in the area of rejection
-Where the fear of rejection comes from, and why it’s embedded into our default setting and wiring from birth
-My 4 step process to begin healing your fear of rejection
-Journal prompts to get you started on this journey